Plague
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Status Updates posted by Plague
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New screens coming soon ♥
https://gasrforum.net/topic/2627-stranger-screens-open-all-screens-are-50cr/
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See the thing with having depression at such a young age, is that you get used to it, it becomes a part of you. It’s who you are, you grow up and the years pass you by, your friends are excited at the concept of another birthday, but all you can think is fuck, I’m not dead. I made it through another year. unless you’ve had depression before turning eighteen, I don’t think you fathom how hard it is truly to get out of this cocoon of suicidal thoughts and depression. You don’t know how to be sane, you don’t know how to be happy, you don’t know a life outside of this pit of self-destruction and depression. The difference is people who get depression after eighteen have an idea what a life outside of depression is like, but when you get it when you’re young is that you have no concept of what life is without depression, or the constant suicidal thoughts. You don’t just get over something that has had a hold on your life for over fourteen years.
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Honestly it's just draining when people are like oh just get over it or oh i got over it, yeah but they've also known a life outside of depression i haven't and i'm glad you're still alive
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Nothing makes me more upset than when people tell me to "get over it" . If it were that easy, don't you think I would have done it already? I hate being depressed and anxious, and I wish it had an off button! Hell, I can't fall asleep easily most nights. I will toss and turn until 3-4am because my brain just doesn't stop thinking/worrying. I am 35 now. So 20 years of this nonsense. I used to be on medication for the depression and anxiety, but I chose to take myself off of them because the long term side effects just aren't worth risking. If you ever need to talk, I'm here :)
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Same goes for you hun always here
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So I'm no stranger to depression, it's sort of become my best friend. It wraps it's loving arms around me, caresses my body and pulls me under into his beautiful void of self loathing, anger, torment, sadness and pure utter nothingness. However recently my depression has gotten to the stage where I'm physically and mentally finding it hard to find reasons to be here. I've pushed people away, I've let people get to me when they shouldn't, I don't want to eat, I just want to sleep or curl up on my bathroom floor and cry. I'm genuinely struggling. I'm not asking for sympathy but just letting everyone know I'm extremely sensitive currently and I apologise if I snap or get angry or even push people who genuinely care away
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